Guess it has a long while since I last blogged just have the sudden urge to blog today. This morning brought my dad to TTSH for his left ear internal bleeding. My old man was up to his own mischief and ended up injuring his ear funnel area. Arrived at the A & E around 0630, there was two main holding area: one for those down with fever and others without fever. Registered at the counter and we were issued with surgical mask. Immediately we were required to wear it at all times. The staff and nurses were constantly on hand reminding everyone to wear the mask at all time. Posters are pasted everywhere to remind everyone of the requirement to wear the mask at all times.
Wearing the mask can be quite uncomfortable especially when I have experienced wearing it for 5 hours. I really admire the staff at TTSH whom worn it at all times. Why I mentioned staff and not nurses or doctors, I noticed that even the cleaners are doing it. No matter how uncomfortable the staff might be behind the mask, they still serve the patients with a smile.
I realise that thermal sensors are set up at all entries to TTSH. Even when I need to transfer my dad from the A & E at Basement 1 to Level 1, I am required to go through the same questionnaire and temperature measurement again. I am impressed they can simply let us go through but they stick to the requirement which is to monitor all visitors.
I was impressed with the preparation in anticipation of a possibility of swine flu outbreak in Singapore. Guess we can safely say that we learn the lessons of SARs and armed with the experience and knowledge it will only make us better. I am proud of my sister who is working at TTSH, it is not an easy job especially in this time of crisis. Everyone is under tremendous stress and pressures but yet the professionalism they have displayed shown us how much we have grow as a nation in the fight against Swine Flu. But sad to say there are always exceptions where people have to be reminded before they do what is necessary.
After 5 hours of waiting, the blood clot in my dad's ear is cleared and he was good to depart for home. On the way home, we encountered an unpleasant incident near the PIE exit at Toh Guan Road. The cabbie was driving around 90 to 100kmph on the outer lane when we heard someone honing him. The next moment, a Black colour Mitsubishi Lancer overtook us. What surprised me most is that the driver gave the cabbie a "I win you" look when he overtook. He looked to be in his mid-twenties, I am shocked the way he drove is endangering everyone and yet he felt that he has won the Formula One rally. The cabbie only has one comment about this young chap, be thankful that this time round the incident did not become an accident. Next time you might not be so lucky. Fully agreed........
Guess that more or less sums up my day for now...............
One last thing just want to wish my lao po dear, Lydia Tay
Happy
102th
Months
Anniversary!
Love You
Miss You
Always & Alot
Too!
- Location:Singapore
- Mood:
calm
Lydia asks me whether I will still carry her when she is old and wrinkled. Well the answer is no I would rather give you a tight hug and kiss your forehead as we grow old together. To me you are and will always be the one and only in my life, hope we will be there with each other till the end of time. There are times when someone asks me whether I get sick of the relationship after all we have been together for 7 years. The answer is simple it is not a matter of how long we are together but it is a fact I found myself falling in love with Lydia more and more as the days go by. She shares the same sentiments as mine eventhough we do not know what is ahead of us but we are confident that together we can overcome anything that might come along..............
When You Divorce Me, Carry Me Out in Your Arms
On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and shy. I was a strong and happy bridegroom.
This was the scene ten years ago.
The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid; I went into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were steadily increasing, the affection between us seemed to ebb. She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school. Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.
Dew came into my life.
It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This was the apartment I bought for her. Dew said, you are the kind of man who best draws girls' eyeballs. Her words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we were just married, my wife said, Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls.
Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my wife. But I couldn't help doing so. I moved Dew's hands aside and said you go to select some furniture, O.K.? I've got something to do in the company. Obviously she was unhappy, because I had promised to do it together with her. At the moment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something impossible to me.
However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt. Honestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner. I was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon. Then we watched TV together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew's body. This was the means of my entertainment.
One day I said to her in a slightly joking way, suppose we divorce, what will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I couldn't imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious.
When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide something while talking to her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes. Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more.
When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I've got something to tell you, I said. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the serious topic calmly. She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I'm serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!
That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew. With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart. The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But I could not take back what I had said.
Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer. Late that night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her writing something at the table. I fall asleep fast. When I woke up, I found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again.
She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but I was supposed to give her one month's time before divorce, and in the month's time we must live as normal a life as possible. Her reason was simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she didn't want him to see our marriage was broken.
She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day? This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I nodded and said, I remember. You carried me in your arms, she continued, so, I have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning.
I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished to end her marriage romantically.
I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me feel uncomfortable.
My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as strangers. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, Let us start from today, don't tell our son. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for a bus, I drove to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this intimate woman carefully for a long time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles on her face.
On the third day, she whispered to me, the outside garden is being demolished. Be careful when you pass there.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The visualization of Dew became vague.
On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as, where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc. I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger. I didn't tell Dew about this.
I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now. She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a sense of pain. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head.
Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it's time to carry mum out. He said. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.
On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. She said, actually I hope you will hold me in your arms until we are old. I held her tightly and said, both you and I didn't notice that our life lacked intimacy.
I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won't divorce. I'm serious. She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no fever. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I can only say sorry to you, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of life, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you.
Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove to the office.
When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until we are old.
- Location:Singapore
- Mood:
happy
Go back for ICT on Monday and will be there until 20th of July, went for lunch today at the canteen. Find it strange as I only see the owner's sons running the stall. They are famous for their western food in the camp especially their steak. After I ORD last July, went back to work as a civilian, most of my lunch time will still be spend there. Was having lunch with my ex-colleague when they told us about the rationale of the longer waiting time. Well the lady owner undergo a medical checkout and it was discovered that she has advanced stage of cancer. It is a shock to me and the worse thing of all she only got 6 months to live. She is always the auntie who love to chit chat with us, the one who will always tell us what is on the menu and that we should always try the steak prepared by her hubby.
Hearing this news it came as something that left me speechless, still remember telling her that I will be leaving my ex-company to another new company 6 months back. She told me it is always good to move on to a place with better prospects and opportunities. I thought I can catch up with her when I go back for my ICT but guess sometimes life is unpredictable. Have known this uncle and auntie for 10 years and one of their son is my basketball buddies, we used to play basketball at the same community centre during the weekend. Looking back one should always treasure the love one around you when they are still around, dun live to regret when they are gone............
Hmm coming back for ICT after a year make me realise how much things have changed since the day I left. The atmosphere that I used to be familiar with are gone. It seems like a ghost town when I went back yesterday, for the first time I felt that the air con is chilling, the familiar faces I used to know are no longer around due to one reason or another. Like one of my friend mentioned people come and go, u cannot expect things to remain the same forever. Guess he is right to say that, after all this is a place that people come and go not many people will have the same mindset and mentality of what we used to have. Frankly I could not find the motivation there, the same motivation that has helped me to work there all these years. Maybe this is the same sentiments that the place I used to work is like a second home to me a place where I have friends who are there to support and help each others out. Guess in life we just have to learn to move on...................
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- Location:Singapore
- Mood: cheerful
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- Location:Singapore
- Mood: happy
It has been a while since I last remember that I have taken so many days, took a total of 8 days MC since last week until this week. Quite frightening, have a fever that goes up and down, for a while was worried that kenna dengue fever but after the blood test result come back everything was all right. But my skin got an allergy reaction to the plaster used to paste on the place where my blood was drawn out. Now plaster is another added thing on my list that I am allergy to. Feeling a bit better today, have make my family worried about me, my mum and Lydia especially worried the most about me but yet I told Lydia not to come and visit me. Dun wish to spread the germs to her especially her health also not bery good. Have already postponed my bridal studio appointment for the second time, will be making a trip down this coming Friday.
But found my voice has become hoarse becos of the medication I am taking. Even Lydia was shocked when I spoke to her over the phone. Guess it is something similar to the time when I face the same situation while I was deployed to France. Took me around 2 weeks to fully recover my voice back. In the mean time will be drinking more water and take food that is not too heaty. My throat has become worse ever since my BMT times (lose my voice then also), everytime kenna sore throat must take anti-biotics. Hope next week will be better by Friday at least can get to see what lao po dear's MTM WG will be like :o)
- Location:Singapore
- Mood:
sick
Guess everyone was more or less mentally prepared to lose my cousin to liver cancer after 4 years but yet the loss was still something that most of us found it hard to cope. It was a chaotic week for everyone, the doctor told us on Monday that he might only have a few hours to live but in the end he only left peacefully yesterday at 11:42am. I went to see him on Friday evening, my emotions had overwhelmed me when I was at his bedside. He still reminded us to take care of my mum, from young he was closest to my mum since he had lose his own mum at a tender age. No matter how mentally prepared one might have been it is still not easy to let him go. Looking at him laying peacefully in the coffin, tell me he has been released from the sufferings............
Looking back if given a choice, I will still prefer to see him go then to see him suffered, gone is the cousin whom I known that often went for marathon. Gone is the cousin whom I known that I can depend on in terms of crisis. Gone is the cousin who will always drop by my place to visit my mum. Gone is the cousin who brought my mum to 周华健 concerts. To my mum he is a son to her more than a nephew, guess my mum will never wish to go for another concert again. Guess we will not be celebrating Mother's Day with her for at least quite some time down the road.............
To my family, it is never an easy thing to cope to lose three persons within a span of 6 months. In life these things do happen, the ones who are living must learn to cope somehow along the way..........................
- Location:Singapore
Time flies it seem only yesterday when the girls boyfriends have just enlisted into National Service, in another one more month most of their boyfriend will be going ORD and become NSmen like me. Meet up for a pengkang cum Wanjing's birthday celebration at Marina South. Din know it was Wanjing's birthday until Pamela reminded me on MSN. We got her a chocolate cake from Four Seasons (must thank Pamela cos she is the one who makes the trip to Orchard to get it).
Wanjing has no clues we plan to surprise her, she still gong gong asks me where is her present. But due to some "poor coordination" nearly spills the beans that is until I kenna kicked nearly blue and black by a so and so under the table then I realise I say too much kekeke. We decoy Wanjing and send her to accompany Serene to go and get extra foods before we set up the birthday cake for her. She was shocked to see the cake when she comes back lor. We have a great time and Qiqi suggested that we all shld go for a KTV session some times next month when all their SO go ORD. It is a good idea after all you girls have done well and have been there for your respective SO through this two years plus of National Service.
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- Location:Singapore
- Mood: happy
To my sweetest and most wonderful lao po dear (Lydia Tay),
It is exactly 6 years and 6 months since we first know each other. To some of our close friends they can't and will not be able understand how we choose to celebrate our anniversaries every month. Guess this is something that is special to both of us, even when there are times we might be overseas due to work or tour, we will make an effort to give each other cards on the 4th of each month.
Frankly speaking I will never forget the times when your letters and cards accompany me when I was overseas in Australia, France, Greece, UAE and India for my average 2 to 3 months overseas attachment. I don;t think you will ever forget about the times when I "lie" to you about my arrival date back to Singapore.
It is another 5 more months to go before we walk down the aisle together. Deep inside my heart I know that there can be no one whom can ever replace you. For I have drifted around for more than 12 years before I happened to bump into you on IRC on the very day when I am on MC. You are the only one whom have tamed my heart and we have never looked back since then...............
Happy 78th Months Anniversary!!!
Love you and miss you always and alot !!!
From your lao gong dear
Jonathan Chew aka Blur Hippo
~~~~~Another week to go before going to My Bridal Room to choose our wedding suit and gowns. It has been a dream since the day I was with Lydia, can't wait to see her trying on the wedding gowns. We have been together for almost 7 years now, 77 months to be exact have asked for Lydia to marry me dun know how many donkeys years ago when she finally nodded her head and say yes last time. Guess all the waiting is worth it, for us it will be another new chapter in our life. 7 more days to go~~~~~
Received a card from Lydia yesterday, the words she wrote touched my heart. She mentioned that this will be her last trip to Taiwan as a "Miss", the next time she went for any overseas trips she will become a "Mrs". The way she phrases it put a smile on my face, no doubts she will not be by my side for the next few days. Deep inside I look forward to our next trip together that is most probably our honeymoon lor. As for where we are going still thinking about it most probably should be Taiwan or Korea.
Lao po dear has just arrived in Taiwan and give me a call, going to be a long weekend ahead without her by my side. Most probably will pack my room and finished the photo montage I am doing for our wedding day. Will be doing another montage that will be shown while the guests wait before the start of the banquet, still pondering what is the theme I should use for this. I am open and welcome any suggestion 
- Location:Singapore
Went down to My Bridal Room to check out the gowns and wedding package today, was impressed by the friendly staff and most important of all they were not pushy at all. The manager (Uncle Quek) was the one who attended to me and Lydia. Simply impressive was the word to use on him, asked us to consider first before making a decision. But told him frankly that we were going to sign up on the spot. The package was a good deal from what I see as compared to some other bridal studio. Most important of all it was the attitude that won us over. A wedding is a one in a life time event, must always choose the right ones for both of us to enjoy the most important day of our life. Will update my blog once we start the actual preparatioon just want to share our joys and happiness to everyone :o)
- Location:Singapore
- Mood: excited
The efforts he make to ensure all passengers were sitted before moving on is another nice gesture on his part too. But I guessed the thing that really impressed me big time was when we reached the bus stop at Dover Road. There was this maid who was carrying a little boy and holding on to a pram. The bus driver stopped the bus got down and brought the pram up for the maid. Next he make sure the maid and the little boy was seated before driving off. Frankly speaking This is something I rarely see nowadays. No doubts all these little acts might seem insignificant to others but to me it brought a smile on my face. This is someone who is proud of his work and go the extra mile in his work..................
Another incident happened while I was travelling home from Tanjong Pagar after my seminar at Amara Hotel. The MRT stopped at Clementi Station, there were a huge crowd jostling to get in and another group getting out. Out of the blue from the PA system, the train driver make an annoncement whether anyone had accidently hit on the emergency intercom button in the train. For this "accidental depressing" the train was delayed for a short while. But guess most probably no one will own up that there are the gulity parties.........................
- Location:Singapore
- Mood: cheerful
Guess this outing more or less can consider our belated Chinese New Year celebration, meet up with the girls at Orchard. Surprisingly this time everybody is punctual for a change. Cos most of the time we are always late and end up waiting for each other kekeke. Proceed to the Rice Table for our dinner, a buffet dinner at a cost of $19.80++, approximately about $22 per person. Still remember was telling Lydia later will be going Rice Plate or Bowl for dinner with the girls somehow or rather I keep forgetting it is Rice Table lor. Lydia was laughing until almost pengz lor.....................
The restaurant will serve all the dishes available for you to try and after that you can order the ones you want. Will post the spread we have yesterday night, food is abit heavy on the taste but otherwise quite all right though. Please dun ask me what is the name of the dish cos I simply lose track of it and not to mention the stupid mistake I make end up become the laughing stock of everyone hahahaha. But manage to got some of the name from Rice Table website, will put it down here. Hope I got it right though kekeke.............
Dishes without pictures
Rudjak Manis - Indonesian Fruit Salad
Gado Gado - Tofu and Bean Sprouts in Peanut Sauce
Soto Ayam - Indonesian Chicken Soup
Ikan Goreng - Fried Fish in spicy sweet sauce
Now I will talk about the joke that I make everyone pengz yesterday at Rice Table lor, wanted to order a calamasi drink one. Told the waiter I want calamari juice, the waiter told me "We dun have calamari juice" the best part I still gong gong point to the menu telling the waiter that is when I realise I have make a super duper big mistake lor!!!! Think Wanjing almost laugh until pengz lor think my eyesight really becoming from bad to worse lor hahahaha...............
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Well after the dinner, it is a common thing for us to go lim kopi. End up we went to TCC at Lido. Here is some of the drinks we have ordered cannot remember the name though hahaha. Only managed to chat for a while with our topics revolving around bridal studio, banquets, photographer cos me getting married this year mah while Sharon is planning for her customary next year also. Most probably will meeting up next week again, QiQi could not make it for this time round. Should be meeting for dinner again wondering where we going to eat this time again. Pengkang maybe hahahaha!!!
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| Citrus Apple Paradise | Oreo Mocha Frappé | Summer Passion |
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Rice Table | TCC |
- Location:Singapore
- Mood:
hyper
- Location:Singapore
- Mood: thankful
My mum blames us for not letting her know what happened to my nephew and cousin. Felt that she could have done something and things might not have turned out in this way now. But at the point of time when my nephew committed suicide, mum was hospitalised for medication allergy. Guess we dun have a choice, will not be able to tell her then. When my mum's health was better, wanted to tell her that is when we received another piece of new that my cousin might not survive his fight against his final stage of liver cancer. It is always the wrong things at the wrong place at the wrong time. When I received the call from my 2nd Uncle on Saturday, I was stunned, shell shocked and simply could not react to the news. Looking at my mum breaking down at the wake, guess it more or less break our hearts. Harsh words from my mum when we told her that we will not be letting her attend the funeral today. Guess she din realises that it hurts us more than she can imagine. But in a way guess it is better that she has went to the funeral, more or less she realise that it will be better for cousin to leave peacefully in this way. My cousin will forever be in our memory............................
Life is simply unpredictable and for those who are fortunate enough should be thankful for what you have in life. There are always others out there who are less fortunate than you or me. Just some thoughts as I pondered over this......................
- Location:Singapore
- Mood:
sad
Maybe there are simply too many things happening in the family, with my cousin in his final stage of liver cancer, our attention and focus have been on him now. But yet a the back of our mind, wish something that can be done in the first place. The signs are there but more or less we have overlooked it. The signs of depression and the suicide thoughts have been there that is why she was hospitalised. To us over the years she has been a constant attention seeker but is it as simple as that or is it a call that she yearns to be care and love by us. That is something that can neber be answered I guess. In the past we always feel that she has caused the family too much problems. But yet it is a loss that everyone felt. To a certain degree, it might be a relief for her to end her sufferings for the last 20 years..............
Until now we have yet to let my mum know about the suicide of my nephew, with this news about my cousin's suicide really wonder how we will be able to tell her. Hopefully when we tell her she will be able to accept it slowly.................................
- Location:Singapore
- Mood:
drained
Time to have an early rest meeting my lao po dear tomorrow, tomorrow also my mum and dad 33 years wedding anniversary. 3rd of March and 33 years that mean 3333 heard my mum already buy 4D liao kekeke. Most probably bringing them out for dinner but my mum quite "resistive" against that idea of going out for dinner. Cos at 09:00pm got the live telecast of Man Utd vs Liverpool on SCV, she will be rooting for Man Utd in the living room while I will be rooting for my favourite team Liverpool in my room kekeke. Think next year this match there will be one more additonal member rooting for Man Utd who else but my beloved lao po dear Lydia Tay lor! The odds will be 2: 1 next year kekekeke. Just want to wish my mum and dad:
Happy 33 Years Wedding Anniversay!!!!!!!!
- Location:Singapore
- Mood:
tired
First day of March let see what I did today, nothing much I guess morning went to pick some stuff from Paya Lebar, thinking how come I am not sleeping at home in this cooling weather. Nearly dun wish to drag myself out of the bed lor if my buddy not giving me a lift to Paya Lebar think most probably dun want to go today kekeke. Lunch time meet up with Wanjing for lunch near my office in Science Park, she is working around the same vicinity also. Did some catch up before rolling back to work again. Have a team building events tomorrow at ECP in the afternoon, hopefully can reach home early then can watch my favourite Korean drama on Channel 55. Time to roll around and go to zZZzZZzZZzZZzZZzZZzZZzZZzZZzZZzZZzZZzZZz
- Location:Singapore
- Mood: sleepy
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- Location:Singapore
- Mood: thankful
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